Synesthesia

This is the ORIGINAL SHORT STORY that my novel of the same title is based on. This does not, of course, contain ALL of the content the novel will (as it doesn't include a lot of his hallucinations that I have planned). It seems a bit much to happen in a short story and the ending may change in the novel. Who knows? I'm not even halfway through it and have LOTS to add. The ending may not be as good with a novel, after all. Oh well, read it and enjoy; this is my favorite of every story I've written.

Synesthesia

“I need to withdraw some money.” Boring places, banks. I tap the counter while the teller looks at the withdrawal slip.
“I know it’s not my business or anything, but what are you taking out this much money for?”
“No need for me to keep it a secret. My fiancée, over there, and I are getting married and I want to make sure she gets the best wedding I can give her.”
“That’ll be a nice wedding,” she says, “or at least I’d hope it is for that much. Where’d you two meet?”
Before I can answer, my lovely fiancée comes over from the waiting chairs by the door and punches me playfully in the arm.
“You weren’t supposed to tell anyone unless you were gonna invite them!”
“Well, then, you’re invi-” I feel cold metal on my back through my shirt and I immediately stop talking.
“Get on the floor! No, not you.” He says, indicating the teller, “You go back to the vault and get me as much as you can. For every minute you‘re back there, we‘ll kill one of them.”
“I can’t do that. I don’t have the keys. Let me get my boss.” She reaches for the phone and I feel a stinging near my kidney. Blood sprays onto the counter. I hear sirens, then more gunshots. The weight of a body falls on me. It’s too heavy to be my lovey. That’s good. I don’t have to worry about fighting too hard to stay alive.
“They‘ll have you to the hospital in no time…” Was that her or the teller? I…I’ll be fine. I black out.

When I come back, all the blood’s been cleaned up and it looks like business as usual. Everyone’s talking, laughing, smiling. Nothing happened? I do have a strange imagination, but I don’t think it’s strange enough to imagine that.
Short blonde hair flashes by the window and before anyone knows what’s happening, eight people are dead. Another eight die immediately after seeing those highly-reflective green eyes. Fourteen more fall after clutching their chests. I feel something covering my mouth and a small hand pushing me somewhere. It’s hard to tell with my eyes burning like this. Why does everything seem so bright?
I feel a breeze and some warmth as if I’ve been taken outside and am shoved forward onto some kind of seat. The covering over my face is quickly replaced with a mask. I can breathe again! She slams a door behind her. I can finally see the seats. This car looks like it’d cost a fortune.
“I’m Erin Baranov. We’re taking you somewhere where you‘ll be safe.” She withdraws a phone from a pocket hanging from her belt. She dials and says, “He’s out.”
“What happened?! What’s in the air?” I say. I’m panicking more than I should be; I should be thanking her for saving me.
“That’s classified information. I’d tell you if I could.”
“Did you do that?”
“I didn’t, no.” She says. Nothing like an apathetic little savior. She flips a switch and I hear the whirring of fans as I watch the air clear. “You are Jack McElliot, right?” She mumbles profanity, then says, aside, “Of course he’ll say it now that I asked. Do you have any ID?”
“Ye--” I very much dislike being interrupted.
“Of course you do! I took you from a bank!” She giggles nervously and takes my wallet, which I’ve just taken out of my pocket. She flips it open, which throws my ID to the window, then to her lap. She looks at it. “Good. You are him.” She gives it back like a guilty child.
I angrily shove my wallet back into my pocket. There’s a brief silence between us. The driver lowers the glass separating us from him.
“We’re at the first checkpoint, Miss Baranov.”
There’s a knock at the window a few seconds later and heavily armed soldiers greet us. Erin holds out her arm, palm up, to them. One lifts a scanner hanging from his belt and passes it over her wrist. He pushes a button and holds it up to her eye. It beeps and he asks her to say her full name, which she does. It pings again and the soldier nods and waves the car through.
“What was all that about?”
“Security’s tightened with all the attacks this month. If you ask me, it’s a huge waste of money.” She looks confused. “You should have known that. Did they give me the wrong Jack McElliot? There has to be more than one in this city. I think you‘re the right one. If you’re not, the right one’s dead by now.” She sighs, shrugs and looks out the window.

I’m outside, camping near a lake. I run into the tent and see shadows of long fingers reaching out to get me. The monster calls, “WHOOOOOOO.” I wet myself by the time my parents come to check on me. I have to change pants, but their’s not enough room in the kiddies’ tent with my mum in there, so I change outside. A car drives by our clearing. The car is painted in bright colors, like an army of clowns had gotten to it. A girl my age wearing a cat mask looks out the back window and I get embarrassed. My dad nearly falls over from laughter.
“Get some pants on, boy. You’ll never get yourself a girl like that. Gotta show some respect!” He says through fits.
I don’t remember what happened to him, but that’s the last thing I ever heard him say.

Suddenly, a few seconds later, she jumps across me, throws open the door and pushes me out. I hit the ground hard on my back and feel the pressure on my chest, accompanied by an electric feeling around my heart. By the time I can stand, I see her a few yards away. She brushes herself off as she walks over to me.
Erin stays low and signals for me to stay quiet. She looks around, then points to an old barn. I start walking that way, but she pulls me back violently. She shakes her head and points to a wheat field nearby, making a hook in the air with her hand. Staying low, I follow closely as she runs to the barn. We run in, then out the other side to the field. She shoves me down, then drops to her stomach and starts army-crawling through it. She stops and motions for me to get ahead of her. Why is the world so bright from this field? It’s too close to dinnertime to be this bright!
When we reach the other side of the field, she prairie-dogs over the wheat and looks back. Since she doesn’t drop down again, I stand up, too. Erin again motions for me to stay quiet, her eyes harsh, as she leads me around a patch of trees at the edge of the wheat. We walk slowly past another house. When we’re over a mile away from where we jumped from the car, she turns to me.
“You move too loudly. I thought we’d get caught in that field!” She said, walking backward past nearby trees.
“I’m not used to sneaking around, sorry. What happened back there, anyway?”
“I didn’t know the driver.” She smiles and explains a little more clearly. “He wasn’t my usual driver. It didn’t surprise me that they didn’t check you, but they always check the driver. That wasn’t the real entrance to the base, either.”
“So, where are we going?” I say.
“Same place we were going before. Follow me and stop asking questions.”

A circus has come to town. I find tickets in my pocket and go to redeem them. The attendant looks at me with an expression of surprise.
“Are you sure you’re old enough to be here without your mum?” Her painted face doesn’t match the serious tone of her voice.
“Mommy and daddy are gone, but I’ll see them again someday. Do you want to be my mommy?” I’d seen it work in movies, so I had to try.
“Jack! Where are you?” Oh great, my mother. Way to ruin my fun. Good job. I see a flash of light again, accompanied by a loud noise. Was that thunder? I couldn’t tell over the sound of the music. It happens again and I’m suddenly right outside a funhouse.
I go in. I walk right past the wavy mirrors. Those are so childish. Fall a few times in the spinning tube, but I make it to the other side, which is where I wanted to go in the first place: The Hall of Mirrors. When I’ve been in it a few minutes, I hear creaking metal and a popping sound. As I walk through it, I pass people who are running the other way and screaming. It doesn’t take long to see why. Flames reflect in the mirrors. I have no idea why the world is burning around me, nor do I know how to escape.

“We’ll have to operate.” Who are these people? I see circular lights, but feel a mask on my face and I black out again.

My legs start to give out from exhaustion. Erin stops a few steps later, turns around, and grabs my collar to pull me with her. “Do you want to die?”
“Just let me rest for a minute or two.”
“I don’t think they’re even that far away.” She pulls harder, until some of the seams start to rip. I stand up and follow, putting up a little less resistance than I want to.
“Where is this ‘secret location’?”
“If I knew you’d whine this much, I wouldn‘t have come. It’s not too far to the real entrance from here. It’s probably not safe.” She sighs. “We’ll have to go through, anyway. Unfortunately, I don‘t know how far in they are.”
We walk for about another fifteen minutes and come to an electrified chain link fence with barbed wire coils on top. We follow it until we get close to a gate. It was obviously attacked. A singed car blocks part of the gate, which is curled away from the car. Dead soldiers, almost naked, litter the ground like the maggots that crawl on them. She motions for me to be silent again. I listen, but I don’t see the point; if we can see through the fence, so can they. She leads me past the gate, running to the trees on the other side.
I expect cameramen to jump out of the bushes to get a closer view, but of course none do. I should have expected guns, not cameras, to shoot us. I hear a shot and dive behind a tree. Why am I getting shot at? What did I do?
I see Erin pull two guns out from seemingly nowhere and shoot from around another tree. Why don’t I hear it? What the hell?! Is that blood?!

“He may never come out of this. You’ll have to make the decision within the next week.” It’s one of the same voices as before. I hear a woman crying.
I feel something wet on my face, but can’t seem to brush it off. I black out again.

Another year, another circus. This time, nothing burns down. All I remember of this whole trip is this girl. She’s on a trapeze bar wearing a strange mask. I can only describe the mask as being half cat, half bird, the cat side twisting to cover her chin, but not her mouth. That was only a minor concern at the time. She danced, standing on the bar, then jumped, flipped, and hung onto the bar with hooks on her legs.
She swung back and forth, eventually gaining the momentum to unhook herself, flip again, and land is some man’s arms. Judging by her age, I’d say it’s her dad, but when this happened, I hated the man. I thought of him as a rival, taking my little dancer away from me.

After what seems like hours, I feel genuine warmth again. I see a wooden ceiling, so I’m obviously indoors. I see Erin standing over me. I can’t move my head; something’s holding it in place. I can’t move anything else, either. I still can’t hear -- unless you count the ringing.
“You’re awake!” Erin’s eyes are much brighter, almost glowy, than they appeared when I first saw them through the mask. My vision fades in and out and my eyes lose focus.
“This is what happens when you jump into a bullet.” She turns to look at something and says, “We have to get there tonight or…” She returns to hovering over me. “You want to get out of here?” She smiles and puts her finger on my nose in an accusatory fashion. “You had better be ready to go in…” She looks at an imaginary watch on her pointing arm. “Half an hour. Any longer and the boogieman’ll get you.” I force a smile.
My hands are numb, I realize. I lift the boney jelly my arms have become and try to sit up, but my hands slide off the table and my head crashes into the bowl that supported my head. It shatters from the force and embeds itself in me. I can’t win. Ever.
Everything is black again.

Everything fades, then I’m in the circus again. I’m outside the tent. I’ve run away from my parents and they don’t know where I am. It’s raining and I’m cold. Eventually, I see her go in her trailer. I follow, but the door is closed when I get there. Wow, I was a stalker. I knock on the door and hear her voice. It sounded so “adult” at the time, but I realize now that she just sounded like every other preteen girl.
“If it’s important, come in. If it’s not, go away.”
“I-it is. It is important.” I stutter. “You don’t know me, but-”
She pushes the door open hard enough to throw me on the ground into some mud. I don’t remember what she said after that. I can’t hear it over the storm. All I remember is her dad picking me up by one arm and looking me in the eyes. My feet were a hundred feet off the ground; naturally, I was terrified. What’s more, he had a mask on, too. His was like his daughter’s, only much more grotesque and unlike any animal I’d ever seen.
“Is this him? Little peeping-tom, I see. Good thing I taught her what to do for bratty little kids like him.”
She must have told him otherwise later on. He let us go out together for what little time they were in town the next year. We wrote letters to each other, but I know she never got mine. It’s hard to write to someone who never stays in one place. I was a stupid kid, never asking where their permanent address was. I know my mum just threw them all away, thinking I was a pervert and she was some freak.
I found that out later on, when my girlfriend told me our parents never talked. At least hers admitted it. My mum lied and said she had talked to them. She’d also lied and said that it was a different circus coming to town; that the one my girl was in closed down and we couldn’t find out where they were.
When the circus came, I snuck out of the house and ran to see whether it was the right one. My beautiful girlfriend danced with ribbons by the door. She asked for that position so she’d be the first to see me.
Not long after that, I saw the bruises on her arms, legs, and back. I also saw the black eye that was hidden under the mask.

When the feeling comes back, I sit up again. By now, my head is bandaged and the glass is removed. When I sit up, I feel a small hand on my back.
“You’ll break yourself if you fall again, Glass Boy.” Erin says. Glass Boy? Wasn’t it embarrassing enough for me to have fallen in the first place? I hope the name doesn’t stick.
She takes her hand off my back and goes to the fridge. I notice I’m not on an operating table, but a counter in a cabin. Something looks a little off about the world outside, but I can’t put my finger on it.
“Is this your cabin?”
“Food’s food. Let’s call it imminent domain and take their whole fridge.” Wait, are her words sparkling? I could understand if she was a spit-talker, but she’s not. And even then, the sparkles wouldn’t be orange. My brain’s not working. I try to talk to see what color my own sparkles are.
“How did you get me here?” No sparkles. Am I that boring?
“I got some friends to help us. We should be safe for a little while.” All of this seems so…unnatural. How did I end up in this movie world?
“Not too much longer ‘til we get there. We have to get ready to go.” Even more red. Did she inhale paint?!
I slide off the counter, my legs give out, and I land on the floor. The cracks in the floor are glowing. Did she give me some kind of drug? I look outside and see the grass is painfully bright green, beyond cartoonish. The water has kid-art waves that appear to be made of hundreds of pieces of layered cardboard.
It’s not a movie, it’s a play. That has to be it. Pretty soon, we’re going to start singing about Mr. Mistoffelees and how awesome he is.
How often does one get to say that? Not enough, I say. Bring it on, world. Bring it on. I’m in a singing mood and my vocal cords are prepared, and strangely well lubricated.

“Are you in there?” It’s that voice again. Why does it sound so familiar?!

On one of our later dates, I remember just walking around with her. It wasn’t much use winning prizes for her; she could get whatever she wanted from here. She didn’t want anything from the circus, anyway. I brought something with me, though. I gave her a pencil with her name on it in sparkly letters.
We walked off the fairgrounds and went to a nearby pond. It was secluded enough and in a patch of woods, so we wouldn’t be bothered. She helps me spread out a checkered cloth that was in my mum’s picnic basket.
“I hope you don’t mind. I kinda had to pack in a hurry.”
“This’ll be fine. Don‘t worry.”
We don’t even have a chance to start eating by the time her father and my mum get there. Her dad takes her arm and pulls her back to the circus. My mum slaps me.
“Don’t you dare sneak off again! Especially if you’re taking my basket and hanging out with those freaks.”

I return to the present, much relieved at having escaped that memory. The waves seem to be getting higher. Even in cardboard, the tide comes fast.
“What are you staring at?” Erin comes to my side unexpectedly and helps me up. I realize that I’d been staring at the lake this whole time. Then I remembered why.
“Don’t tell me you don’t see the water.”
She looks out and raises an eyebrow. “Yeah, I see it. There are these wonderful things called ‘lakes’; they’re full of the stuff!” She turns back to me, takes me by the shoulders, and shakes me.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see a papier-mâché dolphin jump out of the water and do a double-flip. A rainbow trail traces its path back to the water. Swirls of light spin off its body as it moves. This luminescence draws spirals all over its body like a Mayan wall sculpture. When it hits the water, I hear a loud thunderclap. I’m the only one that jumps from it. As awkward as I feel, nothing’s wrong. Nothing at all.

It’s strange watching a performance in the circus with one of its performers next to you in the audience. I look into her eyes and see how bored she is with the flips and tricks. She looks almost sad when I try to get her interested. I brush her hair off her shoulder and pull her closer to me. We snuggle and hold hands. At least she doesn’t have to be bored anymore.
Later on, we went for a walk. Some strange old man comes up to us.
“You two seem like a nice couple. If you come with me, I can get you two married.”
“Thank you, but no.” I say.
“Well, I’m sure you two have certain…other needs. I can get you whatever you want, but you’ll have to come with me to pick it out.”
“Didn’t you hear them? They’re not going with you.” It’s Jamal, the elephant trainer! He also does a magic show with doves while riding an elephant. He does a great job at it, too. “Get out of here. They need to do background checks before they let people into the circus. You‘re alright?”
“Yeah, thanks.” My lovey says.
“I wonder where your father is…he’s not performing right now. Let’s get you two home. Need a ride?”

We leave less than half an hour later. Outside, we climb into one of a Jeep salvaged from the entrance of the base. We somehow got past three more groups of those crazy people safely in this glowing purple vehicle while I was out. The engine roars like a little kid. Layered paper clouds pour out the tailpipe. We drive down the road with pixilated dust swirling behind us, behind which I see something. In the distance, I see the sky and ground flaming, slowly being enveloped in darkness. The flames seem to be mere reflections in the shadows. I point it out to Erin, hoping desperately I‘m not going mad.
“I don’t see anything. Wait, I see something on the road.” She whips out binoculars from a slot in the door. “They’re chasing us. How did they get past the checkpoints so fast?”
“Watch the road! Can’t you floor it so we can get there before them?”
“If I could go any faster I would; the jeep’s almost out of gas and has two flat tires!”
How are we driving over these candy-covered roads without sliding? And why is the dust not made of candy? Why am I surprised by any of this?
Their trucks follow us and get even closer as we enter a checkpoint.
“We’re being chased. Get ready to fire.” Erin tells the soldiers. One of them smiles and scans her anyway. It’s hard to know when to take someone with bright eyes seriously when they say something about a precarious situation.
I watch all the purple sparkles from the scanner stain Erin’s skin, then see the growing blackness behind us. The guard who scanned her loses his smile and orders the others to ready their guns.
“This is the last checkpoint until we get there. Let’s hope they don’t make it past here.” She pulls out and dials her phone. She whispers into it, but I don’t hear the words.
We’re still within earshot of the checkpoint when we hear erupting gunfire. The darkness and flames hesitate at the gate. I watch as the sky ahead of us turns to wet blue plaster. Hanging from it are cotton candy clouds, raining gumdrop puppies and kittens. I look back. The sky recedes and the ground burns again. The efflorescent roadsides wither and burn along with the rest of the earth.

The stress makes me remember the smell of her hair. She’s always smelled of peaches. I never knew why, and that was one of the questions I’d never gotten an answer for, but it always calmed me down when I was angry or depressed. The other question was when I’d ask her about circus life, or she’d ask me about regular life, and neither of us could ever answer in a way the other could understand. Explaining what seems obvious to oneself is almost never obvious to someone else.
One of the times we were out together, I got really sick. Pneumonia. I remember I couldn’t say bye to her when they left the city.

The Jeep runs out of gas a few minutes later while the charred land moves quickly and steadily closer. I doubt this safe house is safe from them. We walk quickly forward with my arm over Erin’s shoulder so I don’t fall. When we finally reach the house, I’ve already stopped stumbling.
“We’re here. Think you can walk yet?” She asks.
When we get there, the sky has already burned away and all I see in it is a plethora of flames from the edges of the scorched earth mirrored in infinite facets above me. The people chasing us are probably already here. What was the purpose of her calling anyone? Did she just say goodbye to everyone?

The door of the safe house opens and gunfire (one of the few sounds that isn’t changing) erupts from the door and nearby trees. The ironic thing is I’m not scared. Nothing’s less terrifying than chimps in hot pink dresses. Okay, so maybe it’s a little frightening when they have guns.
That’s when I hear the sound of fish flopping on concrete. I see the source: an elephant with a propeller on its back. More elephants join and doves fly out their trunks. I watch our simian hunters fall to the ground. I hear shouts, but don’t understand them. Some of the monkeys run away from us, behind the house.
Suddenly, the elephants fall one by one in bursts of every color of the rainbow. They crash to the ground, along with charred doves. Erin and I move back to back and look for anything we can use to take out the monkeys in drag, which is an easy task, as we’re surrounded by armed corpses. It feels a little disrespectful taking their weapons from them. A few shots are fired at us, but I can’t seem to focus on them with all the ringing in my ears.
We return to facing away from each other and spraying all of the others. I hear her gun stop and not start again. I turn to look and see Erin with a gun to her head and three each on her sides. She’s wearing an artistic, beautifully-detailed mask that was half-cat, half-dog. The cross-dressing monkeys slowly transition to strongmen in leotards. That’s slightly less embarrassing to shoot, but I can’t; not with Erin at gunpoint. I don’t want to see Erin get killed over me, too, so I let them take me. They hold their guns to my back, push me inside the house, and yell “SURPRISE!”
At least I think that’s what they yelled. It could have been anything, really. I couldn’t understand it with all the exploding elephants outside. I watch as they take Erin to a back room. I hear a gunshot. The executioner walks out of the room and I get a glimpse of his grotesque mask. He takes me by the hair and drags me onto my back and into the same room he came out of before.
As soon as the door closes, I get to my feet, kick the gun out of his hand and shoot him, launching the mask off his face. That was strangely more satisfying than it should have been. I do have a habit doing anything I can to avenge someone, but usually it results in a less happy feeling. It felt like I killed him for more than just killing her, as if it were a long-standing grudge.
I don the bloody mask and make my way back to the door. I see Erin huddled in a corner, facing the wall. Strangely, there is no blood on the wall.
I open the door slowly, so as to not look suspicious, and raise the gun. They all wear the same half-cat, half-bird masks. My stomach hurts as I shoot them. The room darkens gradually and everything slows down. I listen to the gun pulse with loud beeps. It’s not a real gun?

“It’s been almost a month. It’s not likely he’ll come out.” It’s one of the same voices as before. What are they talking about? I fade out again.

I invited her to my house once to show her a normal day in my life. It, of course, didn’t happen the way I planned it. My mother treated her with respect and didn’t order me around at all. Still, my lovey thought it was fun, paying close attention to every detail, including the smell of dinner, which was burnt.
When she left, I knew I was in trouble.
“Why’d you invite that circus freak here? Now I have to clean everything! My whole house is contaminated with that funk she brought in!”
I didn’t see my love for over a week after that. It’s not that I was grounded. It was as if she disappeared. Maybe her father was just as strict?

“Jack?” I hear a familiar female voice.
“What?”
“Can you hear me? It’s Erin.”
“Of course I can. But didn’t you die?”
“I wish I could see you smile again. I don‘t like the way they have you in here. It doesn’t look comfortable at all.”
“Are you a ghost?”
I realize that the room is burning to embers. All I have left is a circle of wood under my feet. I was wrong earlier. Something is wrong. Maybe it’s just nerves. It’s not often you meet a ghost. Especially at the end of the world.

“You have my permission, under one condition. Give her the normal life she’s wanted so much. You can have her. If you don’t promise me that, she won’t have anyone to turn to, though. She’s no longer my daughter.” That’s not exactly what I wanted to hear, but at least she’d be away from him. I knew the stuff he did to her, but none of it could be proven. Being in the circus offered plenty of excuses for the cuts, burns, and bruises, all equally as believable.
I promised I’d do that for her, then added, “Now go to Hell, where you’ll be welcomed with open arms.”
He broke the wine bottle he was holding and ran after me. I slammed the front door in his face and ran off. The coroner ruled it as a suicide and I’m still not sure whether I regret it or not.

“Will he ever come out of it?” Her voice is quieter, like she’s turned to someone else.
“Out of what?” I say.
A nearly inaudible voice makes its way to me. “I don’t think so.”
“Who is that?” I ask. I don’t know why; I don’t seem to be getting responses.
“Then…pull the plug. I don’t want him to live like a vegetable.”
I…it’s…no, that can‘t be right! I can feel my lungs deflating and my body melting. She’s giving up on me like everyone else? I’m awake!
“I didn’t want to see him die before me. We’re not even married yet.”
I don‘t hear all of what the other person says, but I realize this is it. “Time of death…”